Weightless ⁠♡

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  I stepped out of myself today. I just stood there, a silent ghost, watching my own body move through the heavy ache of living. It broke something inside my mind to see it from the outside to look into my own eyes and feel the absolute, hollow emptiness staring back. I used to hold onto things. I used to have hope. But I watched it drain out of me, until there was nothing left but space. I am so light now. So fragile, like dry autumn leaves. If the wind were to catch me right now, it would carry me away, drift me across the sky, and drop me somewhere so far down that I would never, ever want to come back. There is a strange regret in being this hollow. I watched my body beg for sleep, pleading for the dark to just turn off the noise. But sleep is no longer a requirement for this life. The clock keeps ticking, but the rest never comes. So I roamed. Endless, heavy nights, walking side by side with my lover. Dark after dark, two shadows chasing a phantom. We were hunting for hope, bu...
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🌧️ I Think I Just Want a Quiet Life☕💕

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You know, the older I get, the more I realize that I don’t want to be in this space.

I don’t want to live my life trying to impress anybody because I’m tired.

I wasn’t born for anybody.

I don’t even really know what the human purpose on earth is anyway, but one thing I do know is that we are born to express, not impress 💭

The older I get, the more I find myself wishing for simple things....

mornings that don’t rush me ☁️

conversations that don’t drain me 🫠

a life that doesn’t demand me to keep explaining myself to people

Because there comes a point where you’re just… tired of everything.

Like my God.

It’s gotten to a point where I don’t even feel like making conversations with people anymore. And I know I’m not old, I’m young. I’m 19… 19 +.....but I feel so drained.

Everything around me just feels off🫠💔

I don’t feel motivated to do anything. I’m in school, but classes feel boring. Conversations feel dull. Everything just feels… bleh.

My mornings are full of panic and chaos, and I hate that.

I just want to live my life unbothered 🤍

I think it started sometime this week when I watched this Instagram video of a man who was just… naturally unbothered. 

Nothing seemed to shake him. And I was like, wow.

So now, whenever I find myself panicking or overthinking, I tell myself something:

If “unbothered” was a person, it would be me.

And surprisingly… it works.

Because the truth is, you can’t control everything.

My whole life, I’ve tried to control situations that were never mine to control. Things that were completely out of my hands.

But now, I’m starting to understand that there are things I can control—and things I simply cannot.

So if something doesn’t go as planned, if I’m late, if things shift unexpectedly… maybe it’s not something I need to panic about. Maybe it was just out of my control.

And that’s okay.

But still… I’m tired.

Life feels so boring right now.

I’m 19 and I’m just like… is this it? 🫠

Is this how life is going to be?

Or is this just a phase where everything feels plain, black, and boring?

I don’t know, girl… I really don’t know.

This is just me ranting 🌧️

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